Spark o Life

Spark of fries - Circa 2006

As of late, I've been mildly obsessively writing journal entries in my totally self-indulgent Livejournal that I've had since 2004 (full of high school crushes and drama) and in my actual paper journal. Been doing some soul searching annd have yet to find the purpose of my soul, but at least I'm working on it.

The overlying theme is that over the course of the past few months of life I've lost my spark for life. I've always had it, and it was never a truly optimistic spark either...but rather a biting, humorous, adventurous purpose for life. But now...it has gone. I've been trying to attribute a reason to the disappearance of sparky, but who knows really!

Do you want me to share the possibilities? Prob not, but I will anyway...
-Graduation is in sight, and I fear the zombie corporate world
-Online dating was a fun novelty, but now bores me
-Obsession with raw foodism and all things healthy sucking my soul (working to stop this, I swear)
-Not having enough time to spend with people I adore in life
-Feeling like I'm working so hard right now with no definitive reason why in the future.

Made some goals for the meantime though: Create art, Write in blog or journal (self-indulgence only for now), make more time for friends. End. Bye.

I haaavvveee to post about holidays. Out of pure pseudo-blogger obligation.

Sooo oh oh oh Valentines Day. I love bringing it up and watching people's reactions to it....generally the negative ones because I like to try and read through people's hatred of the holiday to the essence of why they are so bitter. I got 2 Valentines date proposals (possibly 3, I had a suspicion someone was asking me very subtley but I was too naive to realize. Maybe. Probably not.). These proposals were very nice and I'm sure would have been a fine time, but this year I wasn't up for the show of glitz n Vday glam with someone I don't truly care about.


I've been into the caring about people thing lately, which is weird. Usually I don't care.

Sooo oh oh I spent the night with those that I truly do adore and cherish. Wine, board games, heart-shaped pizza.

Epic Battlegrounds

So go spend time with people you love and buy a heart-shaped pizza for them to show your affection :D

ahmazing artiste

Stumbled across this ...

This is my kinda art. Bright, shiny, bold, immersed in real life. This is from an exhibit at the NY Botanical Garden a few years ago.

Now on the prowl to see his work in real life. Check www.chihuly.com .

How to Pick Yourself Up From a Party Lifestyle Vacay

For the past few weeks, myself and every other college kid have been on Winter Break. And now, I must quote my fabulous roomie whom at Coyote Ugly Bar shouted to everyone...

"Winter Break Oh Nine Woot Woot!!!!" (Both hands in rock out signs)

Evidence of drunken roomie:Exhibit A: roomie dancing on bar.

Exhibit B: roomie dancing on toilet.

Needless to say, we have been partying hardy for the past say, two weeks. And then it all came to kick us in the ass. As the real class life is about to settle in, I found myself with a serious sinus infection and roomie found herself puking in the toilet. Which got me thinking, how does one recover from a week long party fest in the most timely manner? This is what I've learned...

• Accept that you will need 1 to 2 days of doing absolutely nothing. This is soooo hard for all us doers and thinkers (Virgos! Not that I beleive in that stuff...). It makes me antsy sitting around doing nothing. But I found myself repeating this mantra to myself: "I have nothing that needs to be done today. Ohm. I have nothing that needs to be done today. Ohm." Cheese-arific I know, but dude it worked.
• Psych yourself up (or someone indebted to you aka a loved one) to make one trip to the grocery store. I went to the groc store and must have looked so sad and pathetic that even the New Yorkers in the tiny aisles were nice to me...that never happens. I bought comfort food, health food, and a plethora of drugs. Naturally.
  
• Don't get up! Just lay in bed. Forever and ever and ever.
  
• Make some pity seeking phone calls. Call people who you know will feel bad for you and try to make you feel better. (Am I the only one who does this? Probably. Je suis horrible.)
• Think of something non-drinking related to look forward to. For me: Dates! This week! Yes! I love meeting new people!
• Avoid too much deep thought about your life or the meaning of life in general. This may cause you to have an existential crisis which is made even worse by the fact that you're feeling crappy and not in a right state of mind. You hung-over mess. I found myself in an existential crisis and crying in the snow in the middle of 3rd Avenue because my ear hurt and I have no meaning in life. True story.
  

So there you go. In case you couldn't tell, I officially reached my all-time low of Winter Break Oh Nine Woot Woot. Two days of recovery later, I'm starting to feel like myself once again (byeee depression) and ready to face the world.

Couldn't-You-Just-Die Hats

A fabulous/notorious boy in my building came storming into the office today saying, "You will DIE! YOU WILL DIE!" and jumps onto my lap and onto my computer. He shows me...

Hey Sailor! Hats

I pretty much did die. Fabulous Boy has plans to custom order one of these babies in an all-black hat with the ship coming out the front. And then he will wear it to fashion week. Naturally.

Healthy Alcoholism

My friends and I are obsessed with organic vegetable flavored vodka.
Don't knock it til you try it!
Two of us killed half a bottle last night.


Crop Vodka

The Shoe Gods Smiled Upon Me

No shame: Clothing from the garbage room.

Color Me!

Have you ever noticed that you look best in a certain color or two? Well, some people base their whole wardrobe off the notion that certain colors best make their skin glow, their eyes pop, and their hair shine (ahem, moi!). I denied this idea for years, but my mom kept telling me about how this idea came about in the 80's and then died away. One day I was at a library book sale and found the book:

Color Me Beautiful by Carole Jackson - 80 cent find at library sale, shwing!

From 1983, and the photos inside are so mind-blowingly-shoulder-paddy good. Reading this book, it was actually convincing. Depending on your skin tone, eyes, and hair, you are given a group of colors:

Winter

photo by norjam8

Spring
photo by peacecorrespondent

Summer
photo by lavie22

Fall

photo by dgmiller777

For each of the above, imagine the landscape from that season -- those are the colors you would wear! Thanks nature. *thumbs up*

I'm an autumn, which by the way friends, is why I don't wear blue! I always stay towards browns, reds, oranges, greens, yellows. Even black pains me to wear (I feel like it makes me look palid), but I can't resist the Lil Black Dress. So whatev.

There's a lot more research out there about this. Generally it's known as color analysis, and I'm gonna be getting into it more soon!

Procrastination Fixation: Ok, Cupid!

Instead of writing in here like I woke up to do, I am living it up in the virtual dating world over on okcupid. I'm a few years late on the trend. Oh well. Better now than never?

Why is okcupid procrastination-worthy?
Endless questions to answer so you can find your perfect match.
You can view who is stalking you at what time.
It gives you exact percentages of how you rate with other people for match, friend, and enemy.
You can search and find your greatest enemy.
Plus, there are quizzes like this...




I have an okcupid experiment in the works. Top secret shtuff, I assure you.

Questions to Answer for 2009

Bad Girl's Rage-a-Day Calendar. Obsession. For January 2nd, it lists these questions for you to answer and check back on throughout the year to make sure you're on the right path to "bad girl satisfaction."

What do I really want from my life?
What makes me feel alive?
What makes me thrive?
What gets my motor running?
What makes my mouth water?
What makes me sweat?

What are your answers to these?

Best Presents

This is my bed with my brand-new wall hanging made by my amazing mum. I really think this is the happiest a gift has ever made me.